Sakura smoothed down the blankets as she watched her brother sleep. Yukito-san had said he'd woken up for a moment or two, but he hadn't stirred since. A single tear rolled down her cheek. The past few days had been so miserable, it was hard to remember to smile.
In her mind Touya was her rock, her strength to lean on. It didn't matter how many times he picked on her, or how many times she stomped on his foot. But now his power was gone, the clean light white she saw inside him had been sacrificed, for her sake…and for Yue-san's. Now as he slept he looked so vulnerable. He couldn't protect her anymore, now it was her turn to watch over him.
Why hadn't Kero-chan ever warned her that something like this could happen? He knew that Yue-san was fading, knew that she didn't have the power, and he didn't say anything.
Now she had failed them, failed them all. Yue-san could have died, vanished into nothingness. And Yukito-san along with him. She wondered again if she shouldn't have just given the Cards to Syaoran-kun in the beginning. He would have been a much better Clow Master than she was. He would have known what to do, he wouldn't have almost lost Yukito-san forever.
Yukito-san…
Sakura rubbed at her streaming eyes. She finally had the courage to tell him. To tell him that she loved him. "But I'm not the one you love most," he said, "You love me because I resemble your father." And he didn't love her. He loved her brother.
Her hands knotted in the folds of the blanket. She knew that her brother loved Yukito-san too. How couldn't he? Besides, he had given up all his power for him. Now that she thought of it she could remember a thousand times, a touch, a glance, a kinder tone in his voice that showed how much Oniichan loved him. And how much Yukito-san loved her brother.
"I want you to be happy." She whispered. And so she would let go. She loved both of them and wanted them to be happy together.
But that didn't mean that she loved Yukito-san any less.
Sakura remembered the pain in her heart as she cried into Syaoran-kun's arms only hours ago. It wasn't even that she was rejected, but that she had never even been taken seriously. Her offer of love had just been brushed aside. She was so glad that Syaoran-kun had been there. She didn't know what she would have done without him.
Touya turned restlessly in his sleep and Sakura laid a cool hand on his forehead. Now it didn't matter. Sakura only wanted him to be happy. She felt horrible knowing that he had gone through so much for her, and she might never have known.
Kero-chan would say that it was her duty to take care of him now, she was the Clow Mistress. Tomoyo-chan would just see it was more evidence that she was an amazing heroine. But Sakura didn't feel either of those ways. Oddly enough it was Syaoran-kun who would probably understand it best.
Syaoran-kun was always pushing her do to her best. Not to break down and cry, not to be frightened. He taught her to think, to feel, to sense. It was because of him that she had come as far as she had. Not because it was his duty, or her duty, but because it was the right thing to do and it had to be done.
She wiped her eyes on the corner of her sleeve. Over and over Syaoran-kun had supported her and helped her. And it extended above and beyond her role in the Clow Cards and Sakura Cards. He had held her so gently as she poured out her heart. She owed him so much…
Touya stirred again beside her and his eyes fluttered open. "Oniichan! You're awake!"
"Aa." He rubbed at his eyes, "How long have I been asleep?"
"Two days. Tou-san, Yukito-san and I were really worried about you."
Touya tried to sit up, but he still felt so weak, so tired. Was this how Yuki used to feel? He was trying to think of a way to brush aside Sakura's fears, when he caught a good look at her face. "Have you been crying?" He reached out and touched the traces of tears on her cheeks.
She wrapped her two small hands around his own and smiled softly. "Arigato, Oniichan."
Now he was confused, "For what?"
"For always looking out for me. For saving Yue-san. I-I'm sorry I never told you." She paused, eyes tearing again, "I'm sorry that you gave up your power for Yue-san. And I'm thanking you for doing it."
His eyes widened. "You know?"
Sakura nodded, "I was outside." She wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug and sobbed, "Gomennasai! Gomennasai!"
Touya smiled gently and hugged her in return. "Don't be sorry," he said softly, "I did it because I wanted to, Kaijuu. I wanted him to go on protecting you, and I wanted to keep Yuki from disappearing. I was glad I could do it."
"I'm not a monster," she whispered. But there was a smile in her voice. Sakura pulled away and favored him with a true smile, one that lit her eyes and filled her face with joy. The smile that he wanted to protect. Suddenly her expression turned serious. "Oniichan, tonight I-I told Yuktio-san that I liked him."
Touya's mind whirled, but before he could say anything she continued. "But he said that there was already someone he liked." She looked at him, her eyes dark and mysterious. "I think you should tell him soon, Oniichan. I promise I won't get in your way anymore."
She couldn't have surprised him more if she tried. "Are you sure?"
Sakura nodded. "I want you to be happy."
He laughed, "You're something else, you know?"
She hugged him again and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you Oniichan."
"I love you too Sakura."
Authors Notes:
1. Bleghh -_- don't like this one at all. Oh well, I guess this is my punishment for not writing a fic in so long. But anyway, now on to the important notes…
2. The title--Kage ni Nari Hinata ni Nari, (litearally, being one's shade, being one's sunshine) means looking out for someone, being there through thick and thin. I was going to call it 'Someone to Watch Over Me' but I'm thinking about doing that as a songfic sometime in the future.
3. This takes place during Volume 10 of the manga. Sakura ends one section crying into Syaoran's arms…(hanyaaan!) and begins the next finally feeling happy again, and wanting to thank him. And I thought there really ought to be a section between there, and I thought it was time Sakura and Touya had a heart-to-heart. And so this little thing was born.